Archive for May 20, 2015

5-20-15

Weather: Beautiful.

Although it is only 34 degrees outside at 8am, it is going to be a great day today. Sunshine for the next 4-5 days. We are closing on Mom’s house on Friday so things can’t get much better. A new web cam is in our near future, great view of looking south down the entire lake. But having another yard to take care of is going to be fun. Or maybe not.

 

11 PEOPLE … ON A ROPE 

Eleven people were hanging on a rope, under a helicopter. 

10 men and 1 woman. 

The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that 
one had to leave, 

Because otherwise they were all going to fall. 

They weren’t able to choose that person, until the woman gave a very 
touching speech. 

She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope, because, as a 
woman, she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids 
or for men in general, and was used to always making sacrifices with 
little in return. 

As soon as she finished her speech, all the men started clapping . . .. . .

5-19-15

Weather: Snow, it won’t stay though.

Snowing like crazy when I was coming home from the bar last night. We even had a little white stuff on the ground this morning. Lots of people around town bitchin about the snow, personally I like it, and I am still hoping them little black bugs freeze to death. It should be getting to the time when they disappear, but then mosquitos and flies will be around, but I can’t blame them, if I could live anywhere I wanted to, I’m sure I would be able to see Lake Gogebic from a few windows of my house.

 

Dr Phil sent me this pic, UP Humming Birds are not pussies, that is snow on the feeder.

hummer

Their three kids, all successful, agreed to a Sunday dinner in their honor.

 
“Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad,” gushed Son No. 1.
‘Sorry I’m running late. I had an emergency at the hospital with a patient, you know how it is, and I didn’t have time to get you a gift.”


“Not to worry,” said the father.
“Important thing is we’re all together today.”
 

Son No. 2 arrived. “You and Mom look great, Dad.
I just flew in from LA between depositions and didn’t have time to shop for you.”
 

“It’s nothing,” said the father.
“We’re glad you were able to come.”
 

Just then the daughter arrived.
“Hello and happy anniversary! Sorry, but my boss is sending me overseas and I was really busy packing so I didn’t have time to get you anything.”
 

After they had finished dessert, the father said,
“There’s something your mother and I have wanted to tell you for a long time.

“You see, we were really poor, but we managed to send each of you to college.

Through the years your mother and I knew we loved each other very much, but we just never found the time to get married.”


The three children gasped and said,
“WHAT? You mean we’re bastards?”
 

“Yep”, said the father,
Cheap ones too!”

5-18-15

Weather: 40’s and Windy.

White caps on Lake Gogebic, maybe the fishing will improve, I have always heard the worse the weather the better the fishing. Check the live cam on the Lake, waves are rolling in this morning.

Bob sent me this pic of a new Meals on Wheels program they are starting in the UP.

meals on wheels

5-17-15

Weather: 70’s and Thunderstorms.

Rain today, good no chance of going out in that damn boat again. Don’t get me wrong it was a fun time, but today I can feel the sunburn kicking in. I am blaming it all on Becker though, she is the one that kept saying “take your shirt off, take your pants off, the sun feels great.” The sun was out for abut half of our 6 your ride, funny how you can still get a burn when the sun is behind the clouds.

The boat we bought ran great though, we were running for about 4 &1/2 hours and only went through 1/8 of a tank of gas. We actually went around the entire lake and bay, only stopping at Fish Tales where I always seem to get their Black and Blue Burger which was great, and then a friends house in the Bay for a short visit.

There were lots of boats out on the Lake, I have never been out there on opening day before, this was probably the best weather we have had, maybe not for fishing, but for boating it was great.

Took a pic of Mom’s house from the lake, can’t wait to close next weekend.

image

 

2-16-15

Weather: 70’s and sunny.

I didn’t go to the bar yesterday so I really can’t say how opening day went. I’ll ask around today. Hopefully Becker and I will get a chance to go for a spin around the lake on the Pontoon Boat today. Running out of stuff to write about, guess it is getting to be time for me to go out and do something stupid again.

 

She was standing in the kitchen, preparing our usual soft-boiled eggs and toast for breakfast,  wearing only the tee shirt that she normally slept in.  As I walked in, almost awake, she turned to me and said softly, “You’ve got to make love to me this very moment!”

 

My eyes lit up and I thought, “I am either still dreaming or this is going to be my lucky day!”

 

Not wanting to lose the moment, I embraced her and then gave it my all; right there on the kitchen table.

 

 

Afterwards she said,”Thanks,” and returned to the stove, her T-shirt still around her neck.

 

Happy, but a little puzzled, I asked,”What was that all about?”

 

She explained,”The egg timer’s broken.”

 

Updated fishing report for Lake Gogebic

fish fishing

5-15-15

Weather: 60 and cloudy. Nice day to go fishing.

Walleye fishing opens today, good luck guys. It seems to me that in the past years opening weekend is some of the best time to fish. I went out early this morning while Becker was still sleeping and caught this one, I bet Becker is going to be surprised when I bring this one home. Happy fishing everyone, I sure had a great morning.

Bonefish-girl1

Henry’s son, David, burst into the house, crying. His mother asked him what the problem was. “Daddy and I were fishing, and he hooked a giant fish. Really big. Then, while he was reeling it in, the line busted and the fish got away.” “Now come on, David,” his mother said, “a big boy like you shouldn’t be crying about an accident like that. You should have just laughed it off.” “But that’s just what I did, mommy.”

5-14-15

Weather: 60 and cloudy. Nice day to go but a boat.

Up early and going to the Lawyer. No Becker is not divorcing me, just got some family matters to take care of, sucks growing up and acting responsible.

Going to buy a pontoon boat today, been up here long enough not owning a boat, well one that runs anyway. Found a nice smaller pontoon, thanks to Marlin at Timberline Sports. Mom is closing on her house next week, I think it will look a little nicer with a boat sitting out front.

Have you ever wondered where and how yodeling began?
Many years ago a man was traveling
Through the mountains of Switzerland .

Nightfall was rapidly approaching and he had nowhere to sleep.
He went up to a farmhouse and asked the farmer if he could spend the night.
The farmer told him that he could sleep in the barn.

As the story goes, the farmer’s daughter asked her father,
“Who is that man going into the barn?”

“That fellow traveling through,” said the farmer. “needs a place to
stay for the night, so, I told him he could sleep in the barn.”

The daughter said, “Perhaps he is hungry.” So she prepared a plate
of food for him and then took it out to the barn.
About an hour later, the daughter returned. Her clothing disheveled
and straw in her hair. Straight up to bed she went.

The farmer’s wife was very observant.
She then suggested that perhaps
the man was thirsty. So she fetched a bottle of wine, took it out to the
Barn.  And she too did not return for an hour.
Her clothing was askew, her blouse buttoned incorrectly.
She also headed straight to bed.

The next morning at sunrise the man in the barn got up and continued
on his journey, waving to the farmer as he left.
When the daughter awoke and learned that the visitor was gone,
She broke into tears.
“How could he leave without even saying goodbye,”
She cried. “We made such passionate love last night!”

“What?” shouted the father as he angrily ran out of the house
Looking for the man, who by now was halfway up the mountain.
The farmer screamed up at him, “I’m going to get you!
You had sex with   my daughter!”

The man looked back down from the mountainside,
Cupped his hand next
To his mouth, and yelled out…..
“LAIDTHEOLADEETOO”  

2-13-15

Weather: No snow today. Just Sunshine.

Two minutes after I posted yesterday saying it was too warm to snow, it started snowing. Snowed on and off all day but nothing ever stuck. Hopefully all them little bugs froze to death.

Someone sent me a better pic (thanks John Clark) of the Eagle’s nest that blew down on east shore road.

 

IMG_1380

 

Where are your Glasses ??
Yesterday my daughter e-mailed me again, asking why I didn’t do something useful with my time.
“Like sitting around the pool and drinking wine is not a good thing?” I asked.
Talking about my “doing-something-useful” seems to be her favorite topic of conversation.
She was “only thinking of me”, she said and suggested that I go down to the Senior Center and hang out with the gals.​
I did this and when I got home last night, I decided to play a prank on her.
I e-mailed her and told her that I had joined a Parachute Club.
She replied,  “Are you nuts? You are 78 years old and now you’re going to start jumping out of airplanes?”
I told her that I even got a Membership Card and e-mailed a copy to her.
She immediately telephoned me and yelled, “Good grief, Mom, where are your glasses?!
This is a Membership to a Prostitute Club, not a Parachute Club.”
“Oh man, I’m in trouble again,” I said, “I really don’t know what to do. I signed up for five jumps a week!!”
The line went quiet and her friend picked up the phone and said that my daughter had fainted.
Life as a Senior Citizen is not getting any easier, but sometimes it can be fun.

5-12-15

Weather: No snow today.

For a week they been saying snow today, but I think it is going to be a few degrees too warm. Damn, missed us again. LOL

Walleye season opens up Friday, I have not fished at all since I moved up here but a couple of friends during snowmobile season made me promise to take them out on opening day. I really hate fishing, I think it is stupid and a total waste of time. But a promise is a promise, I will somehow try to enjoy myself.

merriweather creek

girl at dam

Fishing-girls2

You think you have lived to be 80 and know who you are, then along comes someone and blows it all to hell!

An old Marine Pilot sat down at the Starbucks, still wearing his old USMC flight suit and leather jacket and ordered a cup of acoffee.

As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the pilot and asked,
Are you a real pilot?
He replied, ‘Well, I’ve spent my whole life flying planes, first Stearmans, then the early Grummans… flew a Wildcat and Corsair in WWII, and later in the Korean conflict, Banshees and Cougars. I’ve taught more than 260 people to fly and given rides to hundreds, so I guess I am a pilot, and you, what are you?

She said, ‘I’m a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about naked women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about naked women. When I shower, I think about naked women. When I watch TV, I think about naked women. It seems everything makes me think of naked women.’

The two sat sipping in silence.

A little while later, a young man sat down on the other side of the old pilot and asked: “are you a real pilot?”

He replied, ‘I always thought I was, but I just found out I’m a lesbian.’