Archive for February 18, 2017

2-18-19

Weather: Shity.

Conditions: Shity.

Shity all over, even though we knew it was coming it still hurt watching the snow melting and water running across the parking lots. And it is going to be happening for a few more days. I still think we are going to bounce back for the last few days of February and early March. How long into March will depend on temps. For now gab a Margarita, sun glasses, sun block and kick back and enjoy the mild weather. Old Man Winter may just push the Fat Lady off the stage and give us one last blast. Keep an eye on us a week from now.

Clothing is 30% off and Klim gear is 20% off at Timberline Sport Center and Lake Gogebic Sports. We also have some pretty good deals on rental sleds. 2017 Ski Doo Renegades and 2016 Indys.

Shout out to Rick, thanks for being so understanding about me double booking your cabin, most people would not have been as nice as you were.

Pucker Up

One night my friend John and I were sitting at a bar where he used to work, when an attractive woman, a former co-worker, came in and sat next to him. She told him she had just had a fight with her husband, a police officer, and needed to get out of the house for a while.

They had been talking for a few minutes when, as a joke, I leaned over to John. “Don’t look now,” I whispered, “but a guy about six-five just walked in. And he’s got a gun.”

Without hesitating, John turned to me. “Quick, Ed,” he said, “kiss me on the lips.”

2-17-17

Weather: Warm.

Conditions: Going to be going down hill for a while.

Fasten your seat belts we are in for a hell of a ride. We are in for a major melt down but the woods will survive. But looking at next weekend and beyond it is showing promise that winter could very well return to the UP. Don’t give up hope for March riding, Feb. 24th looks like a turning point with cold and snow coming back into the area. Our groomers will be out when temps permit, so even though you will not probably not see one for a few days remember, it ain’t over till the Fat Lady Sings. The best conditions of the year might only be a week away.

This duck walks into a bar, and asks the bartender, “Do you have any grapes”?

The bartender says, “No we only sell beer here”. The duck leaves.

The next day the duck walks back into the bar and asks the bartender, “Do you have any grapes”?

The bartender says, “No I told you we only sell beer, and if you ask me again I’m going to nail your beak to the bar.” So the duck leaves.

The next day the duck walks back into the bar, and asks the bartender “Do you have any nails”? The bartender says “no”.

The duck asks “Do you have any grapes”?

 

2-16-17

Weather: Cold today.

Conditions: Good to Very Good.

Trails were pretty damn good yesterday and I bet they are even better today. I think conditions will be pretty good through tomorrow depending on the amount of traffic that we see. Terrible forecast for President’s Weekend, but what can you do. Remember a bad day in the UP is better than a good day back home. Unless your sled breaks down and in that case come rent one from me. Looking past next weekend winter may return, don’t give up on March riding, just because January and February sucked, doesn’t mean March has too.

Q: How do Eskimos make their beds?
A: With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.

Q: Why don’t mountains get cold in the winter?
A: They wear snowcaps.

Q: What did the snowman say to the customer?
A: Have an ice day!

Q: What do you call a slow skier?
A: A slopepoke!

Q: Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?
A: Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!

Q: Where does a polarbear keep its money?
A: In a snow bank!

Q: What do you call a snowman in the desert?
A: A puddle!

Q: How does an Eskimo stick his house together?
A: With igloo!

Q: What is a snowman’s favorite breakfast?
A: Frosted Flakes!

Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Snow.
Snow who?
Snowbody!

 

2-15-17

Weather: Cold today.

Conditions: Should be good today.

We should have a few days of decent riding before Spring break hits us. Weekend riding could be pretty good in areas that are not well traveled, fire roads and boondocking will probably be the way to go. Hopefully we get a drastic turn around in the temps after the weekend.

Shout out to Timmy AKA Stem Seed. Thanks for the referral buddy.

A blonde lady motorist was about two hours from San Diego when she was flagged down by a man whose truck had broken down……

 

The man walked up to the car and asked, “Are you going to San Diego?”

 

“Sure,” answered the blonde, “do you need a lift?”

 

“Not for me. I’ll be spending the next three hours fixing my truck. My problem is I’ve got two chimpanzees in the back that have to be taken to the San Diego Zoo. They’re a bit stressed already so I don’t want to keep them on the road all day. Could you possibly take them to the zoo for me? I’ll give you $200 for your trouble”

 

“I’d be happy to,” said the blonde.

 

So the two chimpanzees were ushered into the back seat of the blonde’s car and carefully strapped into their seat belts, and off they went.

 

Five hours later, the truck driver was driving through the heart of San Diego when suddenly he was horrified! There was the blonde walking down the street, holding hands with the two chimps, much to the amusement of a big crowd. With a screech of brakes he pulled off the road and ran over to the blonde. “What are you doing here?” he demanded, “I gave you $200 to take these chimpanzees to the zoo!”

 

“Yes, I know you did,” said the blonde. “But we had money left over so now we’re going to Sea World.”

2-14-17

Weather: OK for the next few days.

Conditions: Poor to Good through the weekend.

Happy Valentine’s Day first off. The next couple of days should be decent riding. The weekend I think will be OK, but could possibly be your last chance to ride for a while. It all depends on how fast it turns cold again. John Dee is forecasting “Feb 22-27 sees a return to winter-like weather”, if this comes true we could see good conditions for the end of February and going into March.

A man returns home a day early from a business trip.  It’s after midnight.   While in-route home, he asks the cabby if he would be a witness.  The man suspects his wife is having an affair, and he wants to catch her in the act.  For $100, the cabby agrees.

 

Quietly arriving home, the husband and cabby tip toe into the bedroom. 

The husband switches on the lights, yanks the blanket back and there is his wife, naked, with a man!

 

The husband puts a gun to the naked man’s head.

 

The wife shouts, ‘Don’t do it! I lied when I told you I inherited money’.

HE paid for the Porsche I gave you.

HE paid for your new 25 ft. Ranger Fishing Boat .

HE paid for your Packer season tickets.

HE paid for our house at the lake.

HE paid for your Golf Trip to St Andrews and your new 4 x 4.

 

HE paid for our country club membership.

and HE even pays the monthly dues!’

 

Shaking his head from side-to-side, the husband lowers the gun.

 

He looks over at the cabby and says, ‘What would you do’?

 

The cabby replies, ‘I’d cover him with that blanket before he catches a cold.’

2-13-17

Weather: Here it comes, kick our ass again.

Conditions: Warm and bumpy.

Well Mother Nature take a Midol or something, quit taking everything out on us here in the UP. If Old Man winter pissed you off it is no reason to put the screws to all the snowmobilers. I’m sure saying that is not going to help but at least I feel better now.

Same goes for the guy we gave a ride to Ironwood to pick up a part, used our shop tools and snuck out when we were busy with even saying thanks. I hope you had fun the rest of the weekend.

Now for a trail report. Well my Mother always said if you cannot say something good don’t say anything at all.

Early week except for Monday temps are down but it is going to get rough for the weekend. Our snow is going to be here for a while, the riding season on the other hand will depend on the temps going down. I am still hoping for a March ride, hopefully it will be on a sled and not my truck.

Fishing For Whiskey

“Poor Old fool,” thought the well-dressed gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. So he invited the old man inside for a drink. As they sipped their whiskeys, the gentleman thought he’d humor the old man and asked, “So how many have you caught today?”

The old man replied, “You’re the eighth.”

2-12-17

Weather: mild temps.

Conditions: They were beat up yesterday.

Warm weather and high traffic took its toll on the trails. I was told by sledders that groomers were out but after 5-10 sleds went by you couldn’t even tell the trail was groomed. This week I am predicting traffic to drop way off, and with temps below freezing at night early week should be decent riding. Later towards next weekend though trails are going to be rough if it gets as warm as they are forecasting for next weekend. Hopefully it cools back down quick after next weekend making the last week of February and March good for riding. I still want to take a March ride with Becker, come on Mother Nature give us a break here.

 

A panda walks into a bar and gobbles some beer nuts. Then he pulls out a gun, fires it in the air, and heads for the door. “Hey!” shouts the bartender, but the panda yells back, “I’m a panda. Google me!” Sure enough, panda: “A tree-climbing mammal with distinct black-and-white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves.”

2-10-17

Weather: Gonna hit some mild temps.

Conditions: Good to Very Good yesterday.

Gonna be a mild weekend, but still cold at night. Next weeks temps don’t look good but so far night time is below freezing. Come on Old Man Winter, kick the shit out of Mother Nature and send us some of that cold northern air instead.

2-9-17

Weather: Cold today then a warm up for the weekend.

Conditions: Lots of snow.

Mother Nature is throwing us a curve ball. A bit of a warm up for the weekend. I would expect rougher conditions due to high traffic and mild temps this weekend. All the snow we received yesterday helped the areas that were thin but will probably add to rougher conditions.

Kent’s Trail Report 2/8/17
– Trail 1 from Lodge to Marenisco – fair to very good – had been groomed AM but a good amount of traffic was beating it up somewhat – only because big snowfall yesterday so grooming doesnt set up as well
– Trail 2 to trail 13 – very good – met groomer coming out of Presque
– Trail 13 going north from trail 2 – best the south half has been all year due to yesterdays snowfall – caught up with groomer about 8 mi north of trail 13 – no rocks showing – very good to excellent – pic is from about 5 mi north on 13 from trail 2

2-8-17

Weather: Cold today and tomorrow.

Conditions: Lots of snow.

Everybody wants a foot of fricken snow. (Tom Miller) Well we got it, not it is going to take a bit for the groomers to get things in shape. We probably got 18+, my truck is sitting in a snow bank at one of the rentals, I have seen enough snow for a while. LOL

I gotta run, trails will be rough until the groomers hit all of them a few times but the good news is snow, and lots of it.

  • My mother wanted me to be a priest.  Can you imagine giving up your sex life and then once a week people come in to tell you the details and highlights of theirs?